Beautiful Messes

I was listening to a sermon online this morning on beautiful messes. One thing thing hit me in a new way this morning, I am a beloved child of God. He loves me in an unconditional way and wants the best for me regardless of where I am geographically. Living in a city as broken as Kolkata and working at a business in the middle of the red light district, I sometimes forget God is still good and still working and still wants the best for me as His child.

I have had this discussion with a wide range of friends at home and abroad. This topic has come up in Kolkata about how God does not expect us to have all the answers, but instead, to embrace our own messiness while working to see His beauty in this city. There are many times I feel so inadequate to be a part of the work in this city, but God can work great things through my inadequacies to help me see the beauty among the mess. As I walk through this city, most of my time is spent looking down to make sure I avoid stepping in all different kinds of messes that line the streets. The sweet moments of a Sunday morning stroll or walking through a less crowded corner of Kolkata are when I have the ability to look up to notice the beauty of the city. I see the bright, colorful saris hanging from the building as they dry in the afternoon sun. I see flowers blooming on a tree growing in the middle of a busy sidewalk. The view from our roof helps me change my perspective and the beauty above the chaos. The bright colors of the buildings are faded and slightly decayed, but yesterday I noticed flowers growing out of the broken bricks. It was a visual reminder that life thrives among the brokenness. I am challenging myself to see beauty even among the brokenness of my everyday walk through the red light district to Sari Bari.

As I write this, Christmas music is playing, the weather is turning cold and we are sipping tea. It has been a restful, life-giving weekend going to coffee shops and eating dinner with friends. I am ready to take on another week.

I will leave you with this picture of beauty among the broken. Happy Sunday!

Some Things Will Never Feel Normal

There is a new group of volunteers at Sari Bari for the next few weeks. As I walked them to the metro, we chatted about the trade and working at Sari Bari. One of them asked me if walking through the red light area ever gets easier knowing what is going in the lanes or walking past women who are working the line. I told her it never feels normal knowing what is going on behind closed doors or seeing women line the streets and lanes of the red light area. It breaks my heart and makes me want to break faces when I really think about it. I hate the men that see a woman a something that be used and abused. I hate that often times poverty determines if a woman will enter the trade. The few times I have walked through the heart of the red light area, I felt the heaviness of the area which stayed with me for the rest of the evening. It will never feel normal.

There is such a stark contract between the journey through the streets and lanes surrounding Sari Bari and inside the walls of Sari Bari. There is a sense of peace as I walk up the stairs and say hello to the women. It is a safe place for these women to find freedom and feel secure as they struggle and fight to continue the journey. It had been three years since the last time I was in Kolkata, and when I landed from a journey halfway around the world, Sarah asked me if I wanted to rest or jump right in and head to Sari Bari. It seemed like a no brainer. I went to Sari Bari and it felt as if I had only been gone a few weeks. There is a sense of hope, joy, peace and love among these women. It feels normal.

I will be spending the holidays in Kolkata which is always fun but not always easy to be away from friends and family. One way you can bless me this holiday season is by sending your Christmas photo/card to Kolkata with a fun note or word of encouragement. It will be fun to see familiar faces arrive in the mail and it will serve to make my room feel more homey. If you want to send other fun stuff (drawings from your kids, 99 cent store holiday decorations, magazines, holiday candy, coffee, coloring book masterpieces created by you, etc.) my roommate and I would not be opposed. (If you need my address click here.) I am so thankful for the loving community of people that love me well even half way around the world. 

Leaning into Community

I have been in Kolkata for almost 3 weeks. On certain days it feels like I just arrived and certain days like I have been here for months. One of my biggest anxieties/fears (which I was terrified to voice) was finding community when I arrived. I knew the Sari Bari North American staff was intentional about spending time together but what did that look like for a short-term person like me. The community had shifted and changed in the 3 years I had been away and I wouldn't have the familiar faces of my team members from last time. I have been blown away by the way the expat community has welcomed me into small groups and morning coffee and spontaneous outings when we randomly run into each other while shopping. It is nice to have people who can say its okay to not be okay.

Last night we had a Halloween party where we dressed up in costumes, ate pizza on the roof and danced the night away. It was great seeing a group of people from 3 different continents come together and talk about the different projects everyone is involved with throughout the city. We talk about the realities of life here and the poop scale. (Yes it is a real thing.) This morning we had community church where all the expats come together for a time of prayer and Bible study. It blows me away that I get to participate in a group of people that love the Lord and fight for justice for those in this city. I love being challenged to see things in a new way and change the way I view the world and streets of Kolkata. I love being welcomed into this awesome community of amazing human beings.

Personally, the transition into life here has not been nearly as hard as it was last time. I feel at home as I fight my way to get places. I have learned how to buy food at the local market and gotten into a routine of hand washing clothes. My morning cup of coffee helps to start my morning as I pray and think about the upcoming day. The weekends are a gift to sit in shorts and a tank top as I catch up on blogs or reading for my internship. I am blessed to have the support of a loving community praying for me and encouraging me as I continue to do life here. As the holidays approach, please pray for our community as we will all be away from family this holiday season. Pray for health as the seasons are changing and sickness tries to creep in. I am looking forward to dancing, eating and celebrating Christmas with the Sari Bari women and the North American staff.

The Importance of a Making Space for the Sabbeth

A few weeks ago, our Friday devotional time was about the importance of taking/having/creating a Sabbath day in our week. At that point I had been in the country approximately 72 hours and knew being intentional about creating space for a sabbath day was a struggle back in the States so I didn’t know what it would look like here. Kolkata is a city that demands respect from all who walk it’s streets so I am learning a sabbath day is super important for sustainability. Often times God sets up divine appointments such as running into friends while shopping yesterday so then we spent the afternoon over delicious treats and coffee. Through my time spent here a few years ago I know Sundays spent in Indian churches often left me more drained than renewed because of the journey to get there and the cultural differences. I wasn’t sure what my morning would look like then I received a text from Sarah, a wonderful human being and  it is a gift to work with her, who had made banana bread and invited me over to indulge in this treat. It was a gift to sit and chat over coffee and banana bread. We talked about God’s goodness through Sari Bari over the years and the way God has blessed her in 10 years in Kolkata. She is a woman who has passionately pursued God’s call and I have already learned so much from her in the few weeks I have been here. I was encouraged and learned so much in the few hours I spent with her this morning. I am learning health rhythms as I settle into life here and a intentional conversation over coffee is becoming something I look forward to as a time of renewal. (If you would like to contribute to the coffee stash that would be greatly appreciated since good coffee beans are not readily available here. You can send them to this address.) 

One of the big projects I have taken ownership of is the annual Sari Bari quilt auction which will happen in May 2015. We are currently looking for people who would like to make a quilt using recycled saris that would then be auctioned off to raise funds for a new building to provide freedom for more women. If you quilt or know someone who does and would be interested in participating please send me an email (nataliecook15@gmail.com) and I can send you all the information. 

I am in the full swing of life here and it has been a huge blessing the weather has been cooler. We are sleeping without our fan which is a big deal in October. I am learning my way around the city and feel comfortable negotiating the metro. My weeks are full of sitting among the women for tea and speaking broken Bangla. I have enjoyed being welcomed back into the Sari Bari community and I am looking forward loving these women well over the next 6 months. 

Mailing Address

Here is my mailing address for those of you who want to send me words of encouragement, coffee or other fun stuff.

Sari Bari Private Limited
℅ Upendra Saha 
Attn: Natalie Cook
9b Imam Box Lane
Kolkata 700006
INDIA

If you are sending a package, the best way to ensure that all the contents arrive safely is to wrap the entire box in packing tape. It makes is harder for mail workers to cut into the box and take things out.

Settling into the City of Joy

Kolkata is a city that leaves you drained. It is a city filled with noise, smells, and extremes. On the way to work each morning, I see people sleeping on the street, children headed to school, people huddling around the cha wallah getting their morning cup of tea, an array of vehicles honking and women working the line. I keep my head down carefully selecting each step navigating the variety of waste and puddles of unknown substances littering the streets. I begin each morning with a few cups of coffee and my Bible because I know by the end of that day I will be drained. Tonight my dinner was a handful of almonds, two chocolate sandwich cookies and a coke zero because I did not have the energy to cook.

One of my favorite things about working with Sari Bari is the sense of community among the women and the way they offer me a glimpse of the love they have to give. The greeting of "Joi Jesu" rings out as they greet me and embrace my lack of Bengali. They share their snacks (a small meal) with me over cha. I have been in the city for more than a week and had not yet gone to the south unit so today when I entered in the building numerous smiles greeted me. They remember me and asked where my other friends were and argued about which of my Bengali names to use. These are the moments I am filled up throughout the day.

Time seems to go fast and slow all at the same time in this city. It is hard to believe it has already and only been a week. I have loved seeing all the ways the city has changed and transformed over the last three years while still feeling like I know my around and where the best coffee shops are to relax and read. I have jumped into working at Sari Bari and I am looking forward to taking ownership of a couple big projects as well as teaching English. It is a full schedule and I love every moment. Here are a few things you can be praying for this week: continued health has been a huge blessing so far, learning Bengali so I can build relationships with the women and our community in Kolkata. 

Familiar and Foreign at the Same Time

As I have explored and engaged the city, I have noticed the subtle differences such as new, clear signs on the metro as well as less spitting on the platform. There are more noticeable differences such as an influx of luxury cars fighting their way through Kolkata traffic and a new mall full of luxury brands which I could never afford even as an expat. It has been three years since I was last in Kolkata and there are so many ways it feels so familiar while feeling so foreign at the same time. There is the familiar hardness of a city where people live on the street and beg to get their daily needs. I feel myself harden as I join the crowds shuffling on and off the metro and hear fighting fill the lanes of the red light area. I fell the pull of western comforts of coffee shops when the stench of the streets becomes overwhelming. On the other hand, I feel my heart soften as I work alongside the women at Sari Bari. I loosen up as I begin to see familiar, friendly faces around the city. In many ways, city which seems so familiar and different is quickly becoming home.

I am grateful for the past week of little responsibility as I readjusted and became reacquainted with the city. It has been really fun sitting with Sarah and talking about the reality of business in a foreign culture . I have asked questions about what has worked and what has failed over the years. I am excited to take ownership of projects and continue conversations to help Sari Bari thrive in the future. Starting Monday, I will learn more about my my role for my time here. There have been a few conversations about how I can help but Monday things become my job. It will help establish a routine for each week. 

I ask for your prayers as I continue to settle into the community and my job at Sari Bari. Pray for Kolkata as a whole during the festival season over the next month. Pray that Jesus would be shown through me as I engage the city.