the still, small voice

this week we had a book discussion on bitter chocolate by pinki virani that discusses the issue of child sexual abuse in india. it gives some pretty startling statistics and graphic details of child sexual abuse occurrences. the last question we were asked was "where is God when this is going on?" in this city there are lots of moments where God's obvious presence is absent. today there was a 5 month old baby brought to mama t's that has water on the brain which made his head swell to double the size. where is God then? daily women are bought and sold in the red light areas and children are forced to live on the streets. where is God then? women are regularly physically, mentally, and sexually abused and treated as possessions of the men in their lives. where is God then? i am learning that kolkata is a city where God is found in the still small voice that continually whispers "I am here." my grandma asked me how things were going and if i was picking up more of the language. that made me realize that i can see God's presence in the lack of words that i speak. so much of the time we try to fill silences with words or try to use our words to be part of a conversation but at sari bari, i love sitting back and seeing God in the absence of my words. i see it on the faces of the women as they do devotions and pray together every morning. i see it in the sharing of food during lunch. the freedom and joy and hope that God has given them are so obvious on their faces. i see God in the smiles of a child at mama t's when they recognize that i am back for another day with them. i see it in the gentleness of the mashis that work with the kids at mama t's everyday. kolkata is a city where i have to choose to stay silent so that i can hear God. kolkata is a city where i have to look beyond the obvious to see God. i have learned the importance of hope (asha in bangla, esperanza in spanish). God shows me hope in this city.

"Then He said, “Go out, and stand on the mountain before the LORD.” And behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind tore into the mountains and broke the rocks in pieces before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake; 12 and after the earthquake a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire; and after the fire a still small voice.
13 So it was, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood in the entrance of the cave. Suddenly a voice came to him, and said, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” " 1 kings 19:11-13